It was probably in April. I was so devastated that I gave up on my life. Surrounded by all my closed ones I was feeling so lonely. No one was ready to listen to me. Nights after nights I cried myself to sleep.
Then, one day. I told myself that it was the end. I decided to attempt suicide. Well I had more attempts before it. But this time it was more serious. I took an anti-cutter in one hand. I was crying like crazy. I wanted to end my life right away. I don’t know why suddenly I took my phone and called Kaan Pete Roi ( I collected the number when I started to get suicidal). I don't know why I felt like I needed to share my sorrows with someone before I die. Now I realize maybe Almighty was just giving me another chance.
I dialed the number and someone picked. She told me her name and asked me mine. I was crying so much that I could barely speak. So I hung up. Then I called again. This time she picked up again. She said her name and asked me if I wanted to share my name. Well I didn’ t share my name. Then she asked me if I was upto something. I said I was holding an anti-cutter to cut my vein. She asked me if it was possible to put that in a distance. Then she started talking to me. We talked for almost half an hour. After hanging up I don't know how but I felt a lot lighter. I took the anti cutter and put it back in my drawer.
Well I won't say things got okay right away. But my life was saved. And things are lot better now. I have grown stronger. I don't know if you’ll ever read it. But I can never thank you enough for saving my life. I really can't. Now that I am in a better place in life I am trying to help other people. I have been researching about mental health and trying to learn more and more about it.
Lastly, I just want you to know that you are an amazing human being and you are a hero for me.
October 22nd 2019